Reality Viewing: Nora's a Mommy
by Curious Kitsune654
Summary: Nora was just having a normal day when a book full of impossibility, and oddly a DVD, came into her life. So, what does she do? Watch it of course. (Collab story with Anonymous Ideas and XXX777)
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own anything from the RWBY or Naruto franchises. Comments/Criticism si fine as long as it isn't hate/flaming.

Thanks for reading and please enjoy

Reality Viewing: Nora's a Mommy

(A collaborative effort by myself, XXX777, and Anonymous Ideas)

-Chapter 1-

-Beacon Cafeteria-

"Hmm hmmm hm hmmm hm hm~" Nora hummed as she helped herself to a large plate of pancakes with extra maple syrup. "Pancakes for breakfast, pancakes for lunch~, pancakes for dinner, oh I want a bunch~."

Chowing down on the delicious fluffy treats as she sang, the energetic girl was done in no time and with a pouty face went to take her now empty plate over to the rest of the used dishes, and completely missing the oddly placed book on the table.

-Gym-

"Ninety-six… Ninety-seven… Niinety-eight… Niiiinety-nine… One hundred! Alright!" The sweating orangette cheered from the bench press as she set the ridiculously heavy bar back on the rack and sat up. "Woo! Six whole sets! New record! I gotta tell Ren-whoa!"

As she rushed off to tell her bestiest bestie ever about her new accomplishment, Nora stumbled briefly as her foot snagged on a book that was laying on the ground.

"Sheesh, who left this lying around," She grumbled while picking the book up and setting it onto a nearby rack of weights before continuing on her way. "That was just careless, somebody could have seriously hurt themselves."

-Hallways-

"I'm queen of the castle~, I'm queen of the castle~," Nora sang softly as she skipped down the halls of Beacon with no real destination in mind, just wanting to stretch her legs a bit after a long boring day in class. "I'm queen of the castle~, I'm queen of the-Whoopsie!"

Out of the blue, the teen suddenly stopped moving and crouched right as another student walked by in front of her carrying a ridiculously large number of books in a tediously balanced stack. Once they were gone, she stood back up with a sheepish grin. "Can't believe I forgot to tie my shoelaces again, silly me."

-Team JNPR Dorm-

Sitting at a small desk stuffed in the corner of the room, Nora groaned miserably as she slowly went through a large stack of homework before faceplanting with the table. "Ugh, this is soooo boring, I don't wanna do it anymore."

"Well too bad, those assignments are all due tomorrow and you've barely even started," Ren said from his bed as he folded both his and her laundry. "Maybe this will teach you not to push all your class work off to the last possible minute."

"You have nobody to blame but yourself, we had a whole week to complete those assignments." Jaune stated while laying back on his own bed reading an X-ray and Vav comic.

"Jaune is right Nora, all of us warned you that you would regret procrastinating doing it for so long," Pyrrha added in from the bathroom, the door ajar slightly to show the redheaded champion brushing her hair. "As my mother would say 'Slothfulness feels great in the moment but always ends in regret'."

"But homework is so lame!" Nora whined as she lifted her head back up with one of the pages stuck to her face until she peeled it off and started filling out the answers once more. "Why do the teachers have to make it suck so much?"

"Because they can." Ren retorted dryly, earning another tired groan from the orangette while Jaune and Pyrrha chuckled at the joke.

*Knock-knock-knock*

Silence filled the room as everyone blinked in surprise at the sound of somebody knocking on the door.

"Uh… were we expecting company?" Pyrrha asked as she peeked out from the bathroom.

"Not that I know of," Ren stated while Jaune and Nora shrugged. "Maybe it's Ruby wanting to look at our weapons again."

"Nah," Jaune said with a chuckle. "She would have barged in already from excitement."

"True… then who could it-"

*Knock-knock-knock* "_Hello? Anyone here? I have a syrupgram for a Ms. Nora Valkyrie from a… Ms. Nora Valkyrie?"_ An unknown male voice called out from the other side of the door, unknowingly cutting Pyrrha off mid-sentence.

Ever so slowly, Pyrrha, Jaune, and Ren's heads turned towards Nora with identical blank looks while said girl was grinning sheepishly. "What?"

"Seriously Nora?" Ren asked back dully. "You ordered yourself a syrupgram?"

"I couldn't help myself! There were over forty varieties of syrup to choose, and they deliver!"

Sighing in exasperation, Ren palmed his face before waving his hand at the door. "Just answer the door already."

"YAY!" Practically teleporting across the room, Nora all but tore the door off its hinges and held her arms wide open with a small trail of drool oozing from the side of her lips. "Come to momma my sweet sugary good-"

*Thwap*

…

Silence filled the room once again as the J PR of team JNPR stared at their teammate/friend in shock as she stood completely motionless, her face hidden from view by the small red book that had flew into her face through the doorway. Soon said book started to slowly slide down before just outright falling to the floor, revealing the surprised look on the orangette's face.

After a few moments though, Nora shook her head and scowled as she stuck her head out into the hallway and looked around for the culprit only to find the area devoid of anybody. "What the heck!? Where's my syrup!?"

'_That's what she's concerned about?'_ Jaune and Pyrrha thought incredulously while Ren just palmed his face at his friend's antics.

"Sheesh, how rude." The bubbly teen grumbled before slamming the door back shut and marching back to her desk with a pout, completely ignoring the book that hit her now laying inconspicuously on the floor.

However, this was not true for the rest of the room as Ren went over and picked it up, looking it over curiously while Pyrrha and Jaune peeked over his shoulders. There wasn't much to see though, as aside from a folded-up note taped to the front, the only marking on the book was an orange swirl.

Opening the note, Ren couldn't help but quirk his brow when he found that it had 'NOTICE ME DAMMIT!' written in all bold. "It would seem somebody really wants you to read this Nora."

"Yeah, cool, don't care." The orangette said blandly as she flipped a finished sheet to the side and started on the next one.

"Oh come on Nora, it seems someone went through some trouble to make sure you got this," Pyrrha admonished, swiping the book from Ren's grasp and dropping it right in front of Nora. "The least you could do is see what it's about."

"Uuuugh… fine mom." The pancake-loving teen groaned with a roll of her eyes before flipping the book open. "There, happy now, I loooooooooooooooooo…"

"Whaaaaaaaaaaaaa…

Nora and Pyrrha droned on in shock, their jaws hitting the desk and their eyes practically popping out of their sockets as they stared at the now open book in disbelief. Curious at what could cause such a reaction, Ren and Jaune took a look as well, only to almost immediately end up doing the exact same thing.

On the very first pages of the book were two things, a disk in a little protective sleeve with the words 'Play Me' written on it…

And a picture of a smiling Nora sitting in chair with a giggling blonde fox faunus baby on her lap while a happy seven year old boy with blonde hair, glowing red eyes, and nine huge fox tails ending with different colors stood next to them with 'The Valkyrie Family' written underneath.

This went on for nearly a whole minute until Nora snapped back to reality and sprinted out of the room with the book held firmly in her grasp, with the rest of her team following after her a few seconds later.

-Dorm Common Area-

"Yay! Movie night!" Ruby cheered as she flopped onto the couch next to the rest of team RWBY, all of them dressed in pajamas, with a bucket of popcorn in hand as she stared excitedly at the large flat-screen hanging on the wall. "This is gonna be the greatest ever!"

"I'll admit this does seem like an enjoyable way to finish the evening." Weiss stated while adjusting a pillow she was leaning on so it was in a more comfortable position.

"Yeah, this was a great idea Blake." Yang said with a grin as she grabbed a soda from a nearby coffee table laden with various snacks and drinks.

"Don't mention it," The raven-haired faunus in disguise stated as she used the remote to turn the TV on and quickly input the correct channel. "Now shush, it's starting."

{_And now for our Feature Presentation_} A deep voice stated as a movie promo popped up with the title 'The Man with Two Souls'.

"_Long ago, in a time forgotten by most…"_

"_Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!" _Ruby chanted excitedly, practically dancing in her seat as the movie started, earning a round of shushing from both Weiss and Blake.

*Swoosh* *Thump* However, before they could even get past the narration segment, all of team RWBY found themselves jumping in shock when Nora rushed into the room at NRS and slammed right into the couch. Then, before any of them could react, the orangette literally pushed them right out of the room, couch and all. "WAAAHHH!" "What the hell!?" "What's going on!?"

"Mine now!" She exclaimed after shoving them into the hallway while zipping over to the television, almost ripping the book in her grasp in half as she pulled the disc in it out before tossing it aside and shoved the DVD into the proper slot.

"Hey! What is your malfunction Nora?! It's our-KGHFDG!?" Weiss started to yell angrily as she and her team got up and began to head back into the room, only to be cut off mid-sentence when Pyrrha, Ren, and Jaune came rushing through, accidentally trampling the poor heiress in the process.

"Uuuh, are you okay Weiss?" Ruby asked nervously while looking at the battered whitette laying on the floor covered in shoe prints.

"Why yes sister… I'd love another crumpet…"

"Yeah, she's fine," Yang said dismissively while Ruby helped Weiss back up before they all marched back into the room to see team JNPR huddled around the TV. "Alright you guys, what the hell was that all about?"

Instead of answering verbally, Ren held up the discarded book to show the four girls the picture within, causing most of them to blink in surprise before gushing.

"Awww, so cute!" Ruby exclaimed with sparkles in her eyes. "Why didn't Nora tell us she had such cute siblings?"

"Because she doesn't," Ren stated, causing the raven-redhead to snap her gaze towards him in confusion. "We've never met those two before."

"What are you talking about? You are literally showing us photo evidence of them having met." Blake said, gesturing to the picture with a raised brow, though internally she was more curious about the boy in the picture and his many tails. She knew faunus biology well, for obvious reasons of course, and that was not a normal trait for one to have at all.

"Hence why we're here." The normally stoic teen retorted.

"Dangit! Where's the remote!?" Nora yelled as she furiously scrabbled in search for the illusive device.

Unable to help herself, Blake smirked slightly while clearing her throat loudly to get the orangette's attention before holding up the aforementioned item. "You mean this?"

*Swoosh* In a blink, the remote vanished from the ravenette's grasp and in Nora's, who promptly pointed it at the television and started hitting buttons until the screen changed to show the exact same picture in the book.

However, it didn't stay that way for long as the image faded away and was replaced by one of Ruby with the faunus boy riding on her shoulders while walking down the hall of Beacon, then one of Penny and Nora with the boy between them in what looked like a selfie, and then to one where the boy had fallen asleep while sitting on Weiss's lap in the middle of a classroom.

All the while, the title '**Nora's a Mommy'** was written in cursive at the top of the screen and a list of 'chapters' to choose from at the bottom, all the while cheery theme music played in the background.

"Ooookay, anyone else as creeped out as I am right now?" Yang asked right as the picture changed to one of her being hit in the face by a pie thrown by the boy while he rode away on a laughing Ruby's back, getting a chorus of agreements and nods all around.

"Great, we have an insane stalker who knows how to photoshop, I'm reporting this to Professor Glynda." Weiss stated, not even hesitating as she pulled out her scroll and sent a message to the witch-themed professsor's number, which was pre-programmed into all student's scrolls in the event of an emergency.

"Alright, and I'll-Nora don't you dare." Ren stated firmly when he saw his best friend fiddling with the remote again, only to be ignored as Nora hit the play button, causing the screen to turn black for a moment before more text appeared.

**-Chapter 1-**

**-The Fox in the Kitchen-**

"Dammit Nora." The young man groaned with a face-palm.

"What? I wanna know what this is about and so do you," Nora shot back with a huff. "Now shush, it's starting."

Sure enough, the screen now showed a video of none other than Nora herself skipping along.

**It was late at night as one Nora Valkyrie wandered the halls of Beacon Academy on a mission. Nora was a short girl with bright orange hair, curvy body that hid her well-developed and deceptively powerful muscles, and *eh-hem* moderately large assets. She currently wore a black shirt with the word 'Boop' written across the chest area and bright pink short shorts covered in lightning bolt patterns that did nothing to cover her toned legs.**

"You actually went out dressed like that?" Weiss couldn't help but ask Nora incredulously, to which the girl just shrugged nonchalantly. "That is incredibly inappropriate!"

"But super comfy."

"That's beside the point!"

**This mission she was on was one of great importance, a matter of life and death, nothing was of higher priority than her current task. Absolutely nothing would stop her from completing such an important task. What is this mission you may wonder?**

***Gurrrrrr* "…Need pancakes," Nora was hungry.**

"Hey, I remember this," Jaune said, getting some odd looks from the others. "It was about a week after school started, Nora went out to get a snack while we were sleeping and we found her the next morning passed out in the kitchen covered in pancake batter, syrup all over the place, and one of the stoves on fire."

"Oh yeah, now I remember." Ren groaned while rubbing his forehead while Pyrrha slumped, both remembering the long, LONG lecture Glynda had given all of them for that incident.

"Well that confirms my stalker theory." Weiss muttered as a cold shiver ran down her spine, Blake and Ren nodding in agreement with the heiress's statement.

**She was currently on her way to the kitchen to make herself a late-night snack as she had already eaten her emergency pancakes, and Ren was too asleep at the moment to make some for her. That was fine though, she could just go make some herself, it wasn't like she couldn't cook for herself.**

"You can't." Ren, Pyrrha, and Jaune said dully at the same time, making the orangette pout.

"Come on guys, I'm not that bad."

**-Mini Flashback-**

_**"It wasn't my fault…" A slightly younger Nora pouted, now wearing her usual combat attire, as she and her closest bestest friend Lie Ren, a young man of Asian looking descent with black hair that had a single pink stripe, pink eyes, and wearing a green, black, and gold tailcoat and white pants, stood in front of a blackened stove.**_

_**"I just asked you to boil some water," Ren said in a tired voice as he palmed his face.**_

**-End Mini Flashback-**

**She could totally cook just fine.**

Nora shrunk into herself slightly as her teammates stared at her with looks that just screamed 'You were saying?'. "…Shut up."

"And the creepiness factor rises even higher." Blake chipped in blandly, though if one looked closely they would see her eyes subtly flickered to look at all corners of the room.

**Wandering along the darkened halls of Beacon all by herself was a bit boring though as she had nobody to talk to though, so she livened it up a little. "I'm queen of the castle~, I'm queen of the castle~." She sang to herself as she cartwheeled down the last stretch of hallway and finally reached her destination.**

"Totally nailed it." Nora said with a fist pump.

"Oooh, could you show my how to do that?" Ruby asked curiously before smiling sheepishly. "I suck at cartwheeling."

"I get it"

**"Yay! Time for pancakes!" She cheered happily while rushing over to the massive fridge at the back of the room. Pulling open the heavy door with ease, she started to reach inside only to freeze. "Uuuuh, what's used to make pancakes again?" She asked herself while scratching her head.**

**"Oh, I know, I'll just look it up." Nora reached into her pocket for her scroll, only to end up finding it missing. **_**'Oops, must of left it on my nightstand**_**,' She thought sheepishly then pouted. "Aw, that means I'll have to use a cookbook, but books are sooooo boring." Drooping her head, she slowly shuffled over to where non-perishables were stored.**

"I know right," Nora agreed with the video version of herself. "All those overly complicated words and boring safety warning like don't do this and don't do thaaaa… hang on, that's not right."

"No kidding Nora, I think we need to have another talk about following instructions," Ren said while fixing the girl with a stern look. "Also, am I the only one that noticed that we could hear Nora's thoughts on the TV."

"No, not that Ren, I didn't forget my scroll," Nora stated, completely unphased by the stoic teen's stare or his follow-up question. "I remember I had it because I was trying this neat recipe I found online called a supreme double chocolate pancake."

"You're probably thinking of a different time you went for a midnight snack Nora, it wouldn't be the first time you've mixed things up when recalling what you were doing," Jaune said. "Like when you thought you went to the store for more Dust rounds last week when it was actually last month."

"Or when you thought we were out of toilet paper when we'd just gotten some last night." Pyrrha added with a giggle, remembering how the orangette had made a mad dash across the hall to team RWBY's room to use their restroom.

"But I only did this once," Nora said with a frown, causing her teammates to look at her disbelievingly. "Professor Goodwitch started locking up the kitchen at night after the first time, so I couldn't try again."

"…Yeah, that sounds like something she'd do." Ruby agreed while everyone else in the room nodded in agreement.

"But if that's the case," Ren muttered as his gaze slowly drifted back to the screen. "Then how are we watching a recording of it right now?"

…

Silence followed his question before everyone snapped their attention back to the television with intense stares.

**When she got close though, she paused when she noticed the door was partly open and she could hear soft crunching sounds coming from inside. Curious, she quietly peers inside the doorway to see…**

_**'Are those tails**_**?' Nora asked herself in thought as she gazed at the fluffy appendages lazily swaying through the air. There were nine of them total, all mostly dark red in color with light blond ends and if she had to guess around eight feet long and very dirty. Each individual one though had a slightly different colored tint near the tips, red, orange, yellow, green, blue, purple, light blue, white, and brown, that glowed ever so slightly.**

**Following the tails to their source, Nora was further surprised to see them all connected to a single person. A young faunus boy, maybe seven or eight years old, with messy blonde hair with red tips, wearing a tattered black shirt that hung off his skinny frame and equally tattered shorts. She couldn't see his face do to him looking away from her, but she could see that he was clutching a glowing red crystal in his hand that she easily recognized as burn dust.**

"Hey, it's the kid from the photos!" Yang exclaimed in surprise as the child came into view, before grimacing at his appearance. "Yikes, little guy looks like he could really use a bath."

"Some new clothes as well," Pyrrha added with a nod. "Those shorts look like they're about to fall apart."

"And now I'm officially stumped on what the hell is going on." Ren muttered while massaging the side of his forehead in a vain attempt to stave off his growing headache.

"Agreed." Blake stated with a small nod.

"Same here." Weiss muttered as her eyebrow twitched slightly.

"What's he doing with that dust?" Ruby asked, her head tilting in curiosity.

**Wondering what he was doing with it, Nora's curiosity quickly turned to shock and horror as the child popped the whole thing into his mouth… AND STARTED CHEWING! "AHH! SPIT THAT OUT!"**

"WHAT THE FUCK/FUDGE!?" Everyone in the room exclaimed in sync, eyes wide in horror at what they just saw.

**Reacting without thinking, she burst into the room screaming, causing the boy to snap his head in her direction and freeze, revealing glowing red eyes filled with terror and puffed up whiskered cheeks. In less than a second, Nora tackled the boy to the floor and was in the process of prying his mouth open.**

"Quick! Pinch the jugular! Then he can't swallow!"

"Call a doctor!"

"Punch him in the gut so he coughs it up!"

"Or make him choke you imbecile! She should induce vomiting by disturbing the uvula!"

"And how's she supposed to do that when his jaw is clamped shut genius?!"

Rubbing her brow as everyone around her yelled and bickered on what to do, even Ren surprisingly, Blake rolled her eyes before taking a deep breath.

"GUYS!" In an instant, the room fell silent again as the cat-girl teen was given their full attention. "Would you all calm down already. It's just a video, they can't hear what you're saying."

…

"Oh right." "Hmph, I knew that." "Sorry…"

"I guess we got a little caught up in the moment." Ruby said sheepishly while wringing her wrists while the others muttered out apologies.

**Limbs and tails flayed around wildly as he tried to squirm free but thanks to Nora's impressive strength and his own lack of muscle didn't get far. Finally managing to get his mouth open, Nora was just able to see as the crunch up crystals vanished down his throat, no doubt towards his stomach. **

"Whelp, that kid is toast." Yang said bluntly, before coughing when Ruby jabbed her in the side with her elbow. "What? Just stating the truth."

**To stop this, she tried to forcefully induce vomiting by sticking her fingers down his throat but was stopped when she felt a strong shock run through her body.**

"…Or maybe not."

**Not really affected thanks to her semblance, even stronger now because of it, her reason for stopping was due to the fact the electricity was coming from the boy. His entire body was giving off bursts of static that shorted out the nearby electronics, burnt various food items, and even caused a few small explosions when it hit some miscellaneous dust crystals. **

"So an electricity based Semblance similar to yours, talk about a coincidence." Ren said to Nora, who just nodded in response without breaking her gaze away from the screen.

**Nora was brought back to reality when one of the kid's legs kicked her right in the crotch.**

"Ooooooh!" Most of the room hissed sympathetically while most of the girls covered their crotches reflexively.

"Wait, that actually works on girls too?!" Ruby asked in horror.

"Yep, despite the common misconception, getting kicked in the crotch hurts girls almost if not just as much as guys." Jaune said with a shake of his head, making Ruby whimper as she crossed her legs and cupped her groin protectively.

"How do you know that Jaune?" Yang asked her fellow blonde with a raised brow, since most guys weren't usually aware of that fact.

"Seven sisters." Was all he said in response.

"Ah, gotcha."

**"EEEEE!" Collapsing on top of him, her hands instinctively shot down to cover the hurting area. (Un)fortunately for the boy, that still left him trapped under her and now he was being smothered by her chest. It took him several seconds to squirm out and pull his tails free, but by then Nora had recovered from the blow enough to tackle him down again, this time from behind.**

"Whoo! Power to the boob!" Yang and Nora cheered while high-fiving, ignoring the glowering look Weiss was giving them both as she crossed her arms under her more… modest chest.

**Wrapping her arms under around the squirming kids arms and waist, she got herself into a sitting position with him held firmly into her lap. Feeling another shock run through her, she channeled the charge into her arms and held tightly as he squirmed and wriggled for several minutes until he finally tired himself out. She was surprised several times during this, but not enough to lose her grip this time, when he suddenly turned ice cold, then burning hot, shot both ice, fire, wind and even more electricity out of his mouth and even seemed to get several times heavier before returning to normal.**

Both teams had their jaws hit the floor as they watched all of this unfold on the television.

"How is he doing that?" Blake wondered out loud, completely shocked at what she was seeing.

"I… he… that..." Pyrrha sputtered out in response as her brain shorted out.

"Sooo cool." Ruby cooed with sparkling eyes.

'_It's like he's using dust but there isn't… wait, didn't he just… but that would mean… no fucking way.' _Weiss thought as her eyes widened so much they practically fell out of their sockets.

**She was never gladder for aura then during this as if she didn't have it she would have been badly hurt long before. Turning the now trembling boy so that he was facing her, Nora looked him over with a critical eye. **_**'How is he still okay, that dust should be burning him alive from the inside out.'**_

Getting right up to the screen, Nora nodded along with her other's thoughts. "Yeah, good question, please answer, now."

**Focusing back on his face, the terror etched all over it caused her to wince internally. "P-please do-don't hurt me-e, I j-just wa-wanted something to e-eat." He said with a heavy stutter as he looked towards the floor as his stomach growled loudly.**

And just like that, the mood changed as the huntsmen and huntresses in training grimaced at the disturbingly loud growling.

"Poor little guy, he must be starving," Yang said sympathetically. "I haven't heard a gut growl that loud since that time Dad tried… experimenting with new recipes."

"Ugh, don't remind me." Ruby groaned, her cheeks turning slightly green at THAT memory. A loving father and great huntsmen their father may be, but a great chef he was not.

**"Don't worry, I'm not gonna hurt you." Nora said as she stood up and let him go much to his surprise. That surprise quickly turned to embarrassment as she then leaned in close and checked his forehead. Not finding anything unusual, she then checked his stomach where she found a large black sun like tattoo across his belly but other than that he was fine.**

"Huh, looks a bit like a Mistralian design but with a more exotic touch to it," Weiss muttered quietly as she quickly analyzed the tattoo with a critical eye. "If I were to hazard a guess I'd say he's probably from one of the more isolated outer island settlements."

Tilting her head, Pyrrha rubbed her chin thoughtfully before nodding in agreement. "I was thinking more towards the eastern mountain villages, but yours does seem more likely."

**"What a-are you d-doing?" He asked nervously, too tired and hungry at this point to run away and thus completely at the girl's mercy. **

**"Making sure you're okay, duh! You just ate an entire burn dust crystal for Oum's sake!"**

**"Y-you mean the s-spicy c-candy?" Nora froze at these words.**

Everyone in the room was the exact same as the on-screen orangette, with stunned looks of disbelief on their faces.

**"You thought it was candy?" The boy nodded, "Who told you that dust was candy?"**

**"Uh, this n-nice m-man on a b-b-boat a long time ago. He-he even gave me some p-powdery kind that was su-super minty, th-though he l-l-looked really shocked after I-I ate it and then l-left." Nora stood there, shocked (again) at what the boy told her.**

"…Oh my Oum." Pyrrha muttered almost inaudibly, yet it might as well been a scream compared to the pure absolute silence that followed the young boy's statement. "That… that's just… how could someone even… and to a child no less."

'_Bastard, he probably did it because he's a faunus.'_ Blake thought as her lips slowly curled into a spiteful scowl, unaware that similar thought were running through almost everyone's heads.

_**'Someone tried to kill him by tricking him into eating Ice dust! Oooh if I ever find that sick son of a bitch, Imma break his everything real good**_**.' Nora thought darkly before focusing on the matter at hand.**

"Amen to that." Yang stated coldly while cracking her knuckles.

**Deciding to drop the matter for now as if it hadn't hurt him so far, then it likely wasn't going to. "Here, how about I get you some real food then?" She offered while holding out her hand to him. Looking at her suspiciously for a few seconds, the boy's stomach roared once again and he reluctantly took her hand. **

"Might want to hurry on that, sounds like the kid has a freaking Beowolf in his belly." Jaune said jokingly, trying and somewhat succeeding at lifting the mood a bit while getting a few appreciative looks for the change of subject.

**Smiling happily, Nora led him out of the destroyed storage room and into the kitchen where she plonked him onto a nearby chair and started rifling through a nearby cupboard until she pulled out a box labelled 'Pumpkin Pete's Marshmallow Flakes' with a picture of a red-headed girl with green eye's wearing a bronze ringlet and a nervous smile on her face.**

"Ugh, why did I ever agree to let them put my face on those?" Pyrrha groaned out as her shoulders slumped, her cheeks gaining a light blush at seeing how silly she looked on the cereal box. That or it was from Jaune slowly patting her on the back in an awkward attempt at comforting her.

**"By the way, I'm Nora," Nora introduced herself with a smile as she grabbed a jug of milk from the fridge.**

**"Naruto," The boy said in return as she placed a filled bowl in front of him and handed him a spoon.**

"Huh, maybe you were right after all," Weiss said to Pyrrha upon hearing the name. "That does sound a bit more eastern than Islander."

"Perhaps," The redheaded champion said unsurely, "But I think naruto oranges have also been getting more popular in the islands these last few years as well."

"Hey, I remember those, aren't they the ones dad's been buying recently?" Ruby asked while looking over to her sister who simply shrugged in response.

**"Nice to meet you Naruto." Nora sat down across from him with a bowl of her own.**

_**'Has never used a spoon before**_**,' Nora idly noted as she saw him 'discreetly' observe her use her spoon before sloppily mimicking. Another thing was that he again 'discreetly' added chunks of wind dust into his cereal as he ate from a small pouch he had in his pocket. She watched with barely hidden fascination as he casually ate the volatile material with seemingly no negative effects.**

"Fascinating… and also rather disturbing." Weiss admitted, an uneasy look on her face as her brain screamed at her at how wrong it was to see someone, a child at that, actually eating dust like it was no big deal.

**Sure, there were such things as dust infused foods, hence why there was dust in the nonperishables in the first place, but those were comprised at most three percent's worth raw dust and had to be extremely carefully measured.**

**Feeling it was a bit too quiet for her tastes, she decided to start up some conversation. "Soooo, you ever pull any good pranks?"**

*SMACK*

In almost perfect sync, everybody aside from Nora and Yang facepalmed the moment they heard that question leave the bubbly girl's lips.

Meanwhile, said girls were looking intently at the screen with mildly eager expressions, only to be both confused and disappointed as the screen briefly cut away to a strange looking backdrop with oddly bulky wooden text.

**-Twenty Minutes Later-**

"Aw man, stupid time skips." Yang grumbled, Nora muttering a quite agreement while the rest of the room raised their heads just in time for the new scene to appear.

***Click, click, click, click***

**The sound of heels hitting the hard floor echoed loudly through the area as Glynda stalked through the halls of Beacon. It was her job to make sure no students were up to any late-night mischief. Standing at an impressive six foot five, she had bright blond hair and emerald eyes set in a stern gaze. She wore a simple white shirt with keyhole neckline, a black skirt that reached to just below her chest with dull copper buttons, brown/black leggings and heels, and a short black cloak with purple underside that had the bottom cut into arrow and flame patterns.**

"Uh-oh, Prof. Goodwitch does not look happy." Ruby said with a nervous gulp as the lovely yet menacing teacher was shown making her way down the halls of Beacon.

Rolling her eyes good-naturedly at her little sister's reaction, Yang wrapped an arm around the raven-redhead's shoulders and pulled her into a one-armed hug. "Late night shifts will do that to ya Rubes, not many people can burn the midnight oil and stay in a good mood like you do."

_**'This would be entirely unnecessary if Ozpin would just approve of those security cameras for the halls and classrooms. But nooo, that would be an invasion of their privacy he says… not like I'm saying to put them in their rooms and showers. We don't have the budget for it, he says… but we somehow have enough Lien to fill an entire forest with hundreds of cameras instead**_**.' Respect the man she may, but she couldn't help but question some of the decisions he's made for the security of the school. **

"Seriously?" Nora asked with a raised brow. "I thought this place was loaded with fancy tech and they were just really good at hiding it. How else do you explain Prof. Goodwitch's ability to seemingly always pop up where trouble is going down?"

"Maybe she's just dealt with enough of people like you she's gotten a sixth sense for it." Weiss suggested with a smug grin when the orangette could only respond by sticking her tongue out at her.

_**'Not to mention the fact we have a comatose maiden hidden under the school that someone managed to steal half of her power from and is likely after the rest**_**.'**

…

"Uh, did my ears play tricks on me or did I actually just hear comatose maiden beneath the school?" Jaune asked after a brief pause.

"You did not hear incorrectly Jaune." Pyrrha answered with a shake of her head, causing the scraggly blonde to slump with a groan.

"Greeeeaat, and just when I thought I couldn't get even more confused at what's going on."

**So caught up in her thoughts on the poor security on the grounds, she was barely able to jump out of the way as an orange and red blur barreled down the hallways at high speeds. "Sorry Professor Goodwitch!" The unmistakable voice of Nora yelled as the blur vanished around a corner.**

"And thus does the bomb start ticking." Yang stated in an ominous tone, wiggling the fingers of her free hand in the air for added affect.

**Knowing she was going to regret it, Glynda went into the room the orangette had just vacated to be the kitchen. She was pleasantly surprised to see nothing wrong other than a pair of used bowls and some spilled milk on the counter. Just as the stern blonde was about to move on though, she noticed a puddle forming by the non-perishables room with the door partly ajar.**

**Walking over to the door, she nudged it open with her riding crop. As soon as her gaze landed on the absolute disaster that lay inside, her eyebrow started twitching rapidly as a vein bulged on her forehead. "That's it! We are getting those cameras if it's the last thing I do. I am tired of dealing with this shit."**

And just like that, the video faded to black, with the text -**End of Chapter- **appearing on the screen briefly before clipping back to the selection screen they had started at.

All of the rooms occupants remained silent for a few moments, just taking in what they had seen and heard over the last… *quick glance at a clock* …fifteen minutes.

Eventually the spell was broken though, this time by Nora as she set a fist on her hip and scratched the back of her head with the remote. "Well… that was interesting."

"I'd go more with freaky and confusing as all hell but yeah, interesting works too," Jaune said as he rubbed the side of his head. "I mean really, what was that? Some kind of fancy CGI or something?"

"I thought that at first too, but I couldn't see any signs of animation anywhere," Weiss stated with a frown. "Not even the best cinematic technology I can think of could make something that perfectly seamless."

"Not to mention nobody could ever duplicate Prof. Goodwitch's teacher glare that good," Yang said, giggling as she rubbed Ruby's head when the scythe-user huddled closer with a nod, and thus completely missing the terrified looks that suddenly popped up on everyone else's faces as they looked _behind_ the blonde. "That lady is so scary she has it down to a work of art, I tell ya she could probably scare the crap out of a Deathstalker with just a gla-*Creak*- …aaaand she's standing right behind us, isn't she?"

"Oh by all means continue Ms. Xiao-long," A dreadfully familiar voice said, causing the busty blonde to slowly turn around to find a very unamused looking Glynda standing at the doorway with her arms crossed. "I am quite interested in hearing how scary you think I am."

*Gulp* "…it was nice knowing you Ruby."

"I'll make sure to bring a plate of cookies to your funeral."

-End Chapter-

AN: Hello everybody, Curious here. Many of you have been begging and demanding that I get a reading done of this story for a while now, especially when the last one stopped being updated out of the blue, and I had looked long and hard for someone willing to write it. Sadly, I was unsuccessful for quite some time, but thankfully my buds XXX777 and AI were nice enough to offer up their help so that you all could have this to enjoy. Thanks for reading and please review.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own anything from the Naruto or RWBY franchises. Comments/Criticism is fine as it isn't just hate or flaming

Thank you for reading and please enjoy

Reality Viewing: Nora's A Mommy

-Chapter 2-

"So, let me see if I got this straight," Glynda muttered as her gaze drifted from the menu screen currently on the television, which just so happened to be showing a photo of her grading papers with a napping Naruto on her lap, to students seated around the room. "You were given a book of unknown origin from an unknown source with a mysterious message along with videos and a photos of events that have never happened involving this school? Did I miss anything?"

"No professor, that pretty much sums it up." Ruby said with a shake of her head, feeling her nervousness spike as the stern professor settled her attention on her, and it didn't help that her normally tough as nails older sister was cowering behind her like a scared puppy.

"Hmph, you were wise to inform me of this right away Ms. Schnee," Glynda stated, her gaze switching over to the whitette who puffed up in pride at the praise, before the intimidating blonde surprised everyone by pulling a chair to herself with her telekinesis and taking a seat. "Ms. Valkyrie, please play the video."

"You got it-hey!" Nora started to say, more than eager to see more of the 'show' herself and had already highlighted the next episode on the list, but was cut off when Ren snagged the remote from her.

"Professor, if I may, shouldn't we be reporting this to Professor Ozpin or something?" The level-headed teen asked with a raised brow while comically holding Nora back as she tried to reclaim the remote by pressing a hand against her forehead.

"You would be correct, however Ozpin is currently in the middle of an important budgetary meeting," The witch-themed teacher said while nodding in approval and agreement with the young man's forethought. "Besides, I want to see this for myself first."

'_I want to see if this a hoax before bothering my boss.'_ She may have not said it aloud, but even the socially awkward Ruby quickly realized that was what Glynda meant.

So, as to not draw any ire from the one who could easily slap them all with a nice long detention, Ren hit the play button.

**-Chapter 2-**

**-Foxy First Impressions-**

**It was nighttime at beacon, and all through the dorm. Not a student was stirring, because class left them worn. In one room specifically, rested the three members of team JNPR, though not for much longer, that is for sure.**

**Focusing on the bed to the far left, slept Lie Ren in his jammies, a simple green t-shirt with pink edging and black sweatpants.**

"Hmm, not bad, I'd give it a four outa five, looks comfy and the colors are nice but a little on the repetitive side, don't you think?" Yang asked as she gave Ren a wishy-washy thumbs up, since his pajamas were stylized to look almost exactly like his usual clothes.

"There's nothing wrong with consistency." The stoic teen replied with a shrug.

**He was enjoying his rest, the beautiful peace and quiet that only happened during these late hours. Nora has been his friend for years now, something he wouldn't give up for anything, but dear Oum could she be an energetic bundle of excitement. He still has nightmares about that one time she got her hands on an Atlasian Mocha Latte, all that property damage *Shiver*.**

"I remember that, you had a part-time job at that cool little coffee shop Atlas Airborne Blends," Nora said nostalgically whilst Ren paled with a violent shiver running down his spine. "Good times, we should go visit there again some time."

"Nora, you're banned for life from ever setting foot in that place again." Ren pointed out, making his bubbly orangette friend pause with a thoughtful expression.

"Oh yeah… well their loss then."

**Unfortunately, his peaceful slumber was interrupted as his 'Nora Sense' patent pending, started blaring a defcon three alert. Leaning up on his bed, he looked around hoping it was a false alarm only to sigh deeply as he found her bed to be empty. **_**'Knowing Nora, I should be getting a new headache in five… four… three… two… annnnnd...'**_

***Bang! Bang! Bang!* "REN! REN! REN! REN! OPEN THE DOOR I GOT TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING RIGHT NOW AND I FORGOT MY SCROLL!" *Bang! Bang!***

**'**_**…there it is.**_**' Sighing again as he stood up, he nimbly moved through the small space towards the door as his other two teammates were woke up by the excessive yelling and banging.**

"Damn, you really have her pegged." Blake muttered as she and everyone else but Nora turned towards Ren with impressed looks.

"Well of course he does, me and Renny are best friends after all." The pink loving teen said as she hugged her friend, who's constant stoic expression cracked briefly for a smile as he patted her head in return.

***Yawwwwn* "What did Nora do this time?" Pyrrha, a red-headed girl with vibrant green eyes and lightly tanned skin, asked as she rubbed her eyes tiredly.**

"Really Pyrrha?" Yang asked dryly as the screen showed Pyrrha's counterpart dressed in incredibly plain dull orange pajama shirt and pants. "You wear grampy jammies?"

Said redhead blushed lightly in embarrassment as she scratched the back of her head with a sheepish smile. "…Their comfortable."

"Meh, two out of five, because you do kinda look cute st-"

**"Probably just another pancake that's spoiled and we have to have a funeral for." Jaune, a teen boy with messy blonde hair, blue eyes, and wearing an adult bunny onesie, said in a dull tone as he shoved his head under the pillow to block out the noise.**

"GAH! My eyes! I thought we got rid of that thing!" Yang screeched over-dramatically while clapping her hands over her eyes, and thus missing the look of disbelief that appeared on Jaune's face. "Hell, I burned it to ash myself!"

"You wha-"

"No you didn't, I threw it in the recycling." Weiss stated firmly with crossed arms, unintentionally cutting Jaune off.

"Uh-uh, Pyrrha gave it to me and I shredded it with Cressy," Ruby said with a shake of her head… before tilting her head with an unsure expression. "Or wait, did I give it to Zwei as a chew toy?"

"Oh come on guys, isn't all that a little excessive? They aren't that bad." The leader of team JNPR said once he managed to pick his jaw up from the floor.

"""Yes they is!""" Everyone else in the room, even Glynda surprisingly, said at the same time, making Jaune droop in his seat while Yang, Ruby, and Weiss continued to debate on who actually destroyed the onesie.

"Uh guys," Pyrrha started awkwardly, getting the squabbling trio's attention. "You're all right, Jaune just has a lot of spares."

"Seriously? You buy those things in bulk or something?" Yang asked Jaune sarcastically… before deadpanning when her fellow blonde actually nodded.

"They were a good deal."

"…No Jaune, no they weren't."

**"Well, we're about to find out," Ren said as he grabbed the doorknob and turned it. He anticipated many thing, what Jaune suggested, maybe she found something shiny, or perhaps she pulled a late-night prank on someone. The absolute last thing he expected was to see his oldest friend standing in the doorway, covered in bits of flour, with slightly singed pajamas, while holding a faunus child, covered in dirt with glowing red eyes and several long bushy tails wrapped around her haphazardly.**

"And just when I thought you couldn't surprise me anymore too." Ren admitted with a tired shake of his head while Nora giggled.

"What can I say, you know how much I love a challenge."

"So this is the child you were telling me about? The one able to eat Dust without consequence?" Glynda asked as she looked Naruto over with a critical eye, though her gaze noticeably softened upon noticing his thin frame and almost literal rag clothing. "Dear lord, he looks like he hasn't bathed in years."

"No kidding, the poor thing looks more mud than person." Weiss said with a slow nod, being the only one that heard the professor since everyone else was focused on the television once more.

**"Hi Ren! Look what I found! Can we keep him?! Can we?! Please! He so cute and knows some awesome pranks! I'll make sure to feed him and take care of him! Promise!" **

"… Seriously?" Ren couldn't help but ask his best friend before deadpanning when she nodded with an excited smile. "He's not a lost puppy Nora, you can't just decide to take him home with you on a whim, that's against the law."

"But just look at him Renny!" Nora exclaimed while gesturing to the multi-tailed child in her counterpart's grasp. "How can you say no to that face?"

"It doesn't matter how he looks, it's still illegal," The stoic teen stated dryly, causing the bubbly orangette to spout as she sunk back into her seat. "And besides, raising a child not some game, it's a huge responsibility."

"I can be responsible." Nora grumbled as she stuck her nose in the air, cheeks puffed out cutely and arms crossed.

…

…

*Snrt*

"Hehe…"

"Pfffft-Bwahahahaha!" "Hehehe!" "Oh Oum ahahahaha!"

"Oh screw you guys." The hammer user muttered indignantly as literally everyone else aside from Ren and Glynda burst into laughter, though if you looked reeeealy closely you could just see the blonde professor's shoulders shaking slightly while her lips slightly curled upwards.

**Nora rambled on at a rapid pace before calming down, muttering "…Though we are gonna need a lot of shampoo and conditioner…" to herself while glancing at several patches of mud that were stuck to the tails.**

"Hahaha… understatement of the century there," Yang said breathlessly once she managed to get her laughter under control, idly wiping a tear from her eyes as she did so. "With that much fluff I think he'd even have Weiss beat on taking the most expensive baths ever."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Said ice queen demanded, frowning when all she got in response were a series of looks from her teammates that screamed 'You're kidding, right?. "What? I'm not that bad, am I?"

"Weiss, you have a different type of shampoo, conditioner, and bodywash for each day of the week, and use Mistrilian bath salts that cost more per pound than all of Ruby, Yang, and my stuff combined." Blake stated dryly, making the whitette pause before bowing her head in defeat.

"…Point taken."

"Aw, what's wrong Ice Queen, upset that everyone knows why you're so _salty_ all the time?" Yang punned with a wide grin, only for it to quickly turn to a frown when she was greeted with a chorus of annoyed/exasperated groans. "Oh come on, that one was hilarious!"

**If they weren't paying attention before, Nora definitely had all three of her room/teammates attention now as she zipped past Ren and set Naruto down on her bed. "Nora… who's that?" Pyrrha asked cautiously as she discreetly reached for her scroll just in case. …What? Her teammate of only two weeks just walked into their room in the middle of the night, carrying a child clearly not her own, and asked if she could keep him.**

**If Nora just kidnapped a kid like she thought, then she was not gonna hesitate to call the cops on her ass.**

"Sorry Nora but that does kinda look bad out of context." Pyrrha muttered with a sheepish smile as the screen showed her counterpart carefully dialing the police behind her back.

Thankfully for the redhead, Nora wasn't upset and simply waved off her apology. "No worries, wouldn't be the first time I almost got arrested for a misunderstanding."

"Why am I not surprised by that?" Weiss asked dully, earning herself a stuck-out tongue from the bubbly orangette.

**"Oh, this is Naruto! I found him in the kitchen cupboard eating dust while I was trying to make pancakes!"**

**"…"**

**"…"**

**"Aww, that reminds me, I never got any pancakes." Nora pouted as she sat down next to the dirty blonde.**

**Scratch that, she was calling a mental ward.**

"Let me guess, that also wouldn't be the first time?" Jaune asked Nora as everyone turned towards the pink-loving teen, who simply shrugged nonchalantly with a mischievous grin.

"…Maybe…"

**"D-did you j-j-just say e-eating dust?" Jaune asked with a shocked face as Nora nodded happily.**

**"Yep, little guy thinks it's candy, watch." To everyone's horror, she pulled out a small burn crystal from… somewhere and popped it into Naruto's mouth before they could react.**

**"Are you crazy?!" Pyrrha yelled as she shoved Nora out of the way and forced the boy's mouth open only to see it empty.**

"Well of course I'm crazy," Nora suddenly stated without an ounce of shame. "Do you have any idea how boring it is to be sane?"

"Amen to that." Yang agreed with a grin as she and the orangette high-fived.

**"Jaune! Call the nurse, we… have… to…" The red-head trailed off as she realized Naruto wasn't showing any signs of pain or discomfort. That couldn't be right. Checking him over, then doing so again, Pyrrha felt her jaw hit the floor as she realized he was perfectly fine.**

"By Oum…" Glynda muttered, a chill running down her spine at seeing a child casually eat one of the most dangerous substances in all of Remnant. "To hear about it is one thing but to actually see it, I don't know whether to be astounded or disturbed."

"Agreed." Weiss stated with a slow nod.

**"See? Like I said, eats it like candy." Nora said dramatically as she got up from the floor, dusted herself off, and plopped next to while draping her arm over the red-heads shoulders.**

**"But… that's not… be should be… How?" Was all Pyrrha's short circuited brain could managed to get out as it tried to process what she just saw.**

"Can't blame her there, I'm still trying to wrap my head around it." Pyrrha said as she watched her doppelganger struggling to form a complete sentence.

**"If you think that's mind-blowing, then watch this. Hey Naruto, I'll give you another treat if you breathe fire." To prove she meant it, Nora held out a large earth dust crystal for him to see.**

**Nodding excitedly, Naruto turned towards the doorway since no one was there and inhaled deeply. Unfortunately, at that exact moment a certain short statured, white-haired, blue eyed ice queen that we all know and love decided to appear with an angry expression.**

"…Oh no." Weiss muttered with wide eyes. "Oh no no no no no NO NO!"

**"Do you guys know what time it is!? People are trying to sle- WHAT THE FUCK!" One Weiss Schnee started to nag as she barged through the open doorway in her favorite nightie only to end up screaming at the top of her lungs when she was greeted with the sight of a blazing inferno heading straight for her.**

**When the flames died down, team JNPR was greeted to the sight of a smoking, blackened, and singed heiress now wearing the remains of her favorite nightie as she stood in the doorway with a gaping expression. **

As if to add insult to injury, the screen highlighted Weiss's charred form dramatically with dramatic music as a white bar reading 'The Roasted Royal: Weiss Schnee' flew in for a few seconds beneath her.

**Nora immediately fell to the floor laughing, Ren just sighed as he rubbed his forehead in a doomed attempt to stave off the rapidly approaching headache, Jaune had fainted, and Pyrrha was still sitting on the bed with an identical expression to Weiss's.**

"""HAHAHAHAHA!"""

"Stop laughing! It's not that funny!"

"Awww, does somebody need some Weiss for that burn? Hahahaha!"

Needless to say, almost everyone's reactions were identical to those on screen, with the only exception being Weiss herself, who looked ready to have an aneurysm as she screamed at the giggling sister duo of Ruby and Yang.

Meanwhile, Blake simple smirked in amusement with a light shaking of her shoulders and Glynda sighed exasperatedly as she massaged the side of her head.

**"Weiss, I thought you came over here to… what the hell happened to you?" A smooth, feminine voice asked as three girls peeked through the doorway. The one who spoke had dark black hair, striking yellow catlike eyes, and a simple black ribbon atop her head and wore a black yukata style shirt and matching skirt, the book loving Blake.**

Just like with Weiss, Blake's counterpart was briefly highlighted the moment she appeared on screen with an intro bar of her own, only colored black and reading 'The Catty Critic: Blake Belladonna.'

"Catty Critic? Really? That sounds like a pun you'd make." The ravenette muttered dully as she glanced towards her partner, only to immediately deadpan upon seeing said bomb-tastic blonde jotting down notes in a small notepad.

"That's not fair, why didn't I get a cool intro?" Nora demanded with a pout. "The title is literally Nora's a Mommy for crying out loud."

"Lazy editor?" Ren suggested unsurely.

**The second girl had long blonde hair that reached to her thighs and lilac eyes wearing a simple orange shirt with a burning heart in the middle and black shorts, the murderer of puns Yang. **

"Hey! I resent that!" Yang exclaimed when she saw her title 'The Comedic Flop: Yang Xiao-Long.'

**The final girl was a short silver-eyed teen with black hair and red highlights, wearing white baggy pajama bottoms covered in roses and a black tank top with a heart stylized beowolf, team RWBY's mascot/leader Ruby.**

"Eeep!" As soon as her own title 'The Mechaphiliac Reaper: Ruby Rose' appeared, poor Ruby's face turned almost as red as her cloak.

"Aaaaand I retract my earlier complaint." Nora said with her hands held up in mock surrender.

**Snapping out of her daze, Weiss gain a furious look on her face as she looked down at her clothes and looked up again ready to chew some heads off only to drift off back to la la land from what she saw. "Uh, Weiss? Hello?" Ruby walked in front of the white themed girl and snapped her fingers several ties to no avail.**

**Following the white themed girl's gaze, the other three members of team RWBY quickly joined Weiss as they saw Naruto sitting on the bed with a happy expression as he sat on Nora's lap, gnawing on the dust crystal she gave him once she stopped laughing. Noticing all the eyes on her, Nora scratched the back of her head with a big grin. "Uh, okay, I can so totally explain…"**

"This outa be interesting." Yang said with a chuckle, remembering all the exaggerated tales the bubbly orangette would tell during breakfast which Ren would then edit down to the actual thing.

**-Insert comical batman transition with Nora's face-**

**"…and that's what happened." Nora finished as she gently stroked the now sleeping fox faunus's head as he lay curled up on her lap.**

"Oh Oum dammit, stupid time-skips." The busy blonde grumbled, ignoring as Ruby swatted her head with a cry of "Language!".

**She couldn't do much else as his tails had wrapped themselves around them both tightly while she talked, leaving only one of her arms free and making them look like fluffy red mummies.**

**"I'm pretty sure the whole fighting through a horde of beowolves part was complete bull, but everything else does sound legit I guess." Yang said from her spot next to Ruby and Pyrrha, getting nods all around as Nora pouted.**

"Yeah, that's sounds about right." Ren said with an amused shake of his head.

**"I'm still wondering how he got in Beacon by himself, and do it without being noticed, those tails aren't exactly inconspicuous." Weiss stated as she stood by the doorway with her arms crossed, now wearing her backup nightie while sending occasional glares at Nora. Naruto may have been the one to almost roast her alive, but it was Nora's fault for it, he was just an innocent impressionable child… And because she found him just to adorable to stay mad at (except for the eyes, those actually unnerved her a little) not that she would ever admit it, so she focused that anger on the orangette.**

"Yeah, he is pretty darn cute," Ruby agreed while barely resisting the urge to gush when Naruto's leg twitched a bit, just like their dog Zwei's when someone pet his belly. "And I just wanna hug him and snuggle for hours, don't you?"

"Yes," Weiss admitted, since everyone already knew she really liked cute things, that was kinda out of the bag ever since Zwei started living in their dorm. "But preferably after he's gotten a bath, so he's not so… grungy."

"Yeah, good point."

**"Oh, he told me that he had fallen asleep inside a storage crate after eating all the dust in it yesterday and when he woke up he was here at Beacon." Nora said, only for Weiss to interject.**

**"That's not possible, the next dust delivery isn't for another week, and even then, all containers are always inspected thoroughly before and after they are delivered." She explained. Silence followed her statement, causing her to look around and see all the weird looks she was getting. "What?"**

**"…I get that you're a Schnee and all… but why exactly do you know the schools dust delivery schedule?" Blake was the one to ask what everyone was thinking. Weiss scoffed while sticking her nose into the air.**

**"Because I get my personal supply of dust delivered in the same shipments, obviously. My-"**

**"Yeah, yeah, we get it Ice Queen," ("Stop calling me that!" Weiss yelled) "You're rich with a lot of cool stuff, can we get back to the matter at hand?" Yang drawled out, cutting Weiss off before she could fall into one of her rants.**

"Seriously, why does everyone keep calling me that?" Said Ice Queen groaned as she rubbed the sides of her head before glaring at Yang. "And I do not go into rants."

"Really?" The bodacious blonde asked coyly while holding out her hand as a fist and uncurling a finger. "Then what about during orientation with that dust pamphlet-"

"Your sister blew me up!"

It was an accident! I swear!"

"-or breakfast when you keep going on about proper nutrition-"

"Ice cream sundaes are not an exceptable fruit side!"

"But they have bananas!"

"-and let's not forget that time when Ruby accidently used your toothbrush-"

"It has my name written on it for Oum's sake!"

"EEP! I said I was sorry!"

"Well that didn't take very long." Blake muttered while pausing the TV as her teammates got into a squabble, which mostly consisted of Yang pointing out moments Weiss had ranted, Weiss defending herself with some logic, and poor Ruby being involved somehow or another.

After a few minutes they eventually ran out of steam, or in this case Yang ran out of examples to use, and they soon settled back down.

**"Um, maybe they changed the shipment days cause of all the robberies lately, and they forgot to examine it due to the different times for shipping." Ruby suggested, before shrinking in on herself slightly as everyone turned to her.**

**"It's... possible," Weiss admitted, almost reluctantly, after thinking it over for a minute.**

"Quite astute of you Ms. Rose," Glynda confirmed with a nod. "With all the robberies lately, we have been implementing a new system of varied shipping times to help prevent further thefts, though that had caused some issues at first."

Blushing lightly at the praise, Ruby shrank into herself a bit as she mumbled a thanks, before gasping when Yang wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her into a hug. "Woo! Go Rubes! Way to use that brain of yours!"

"Choking… not breathing… choking… not breathing!"

**"Great, that's all solved, now onto our next objective! Naruto Valkyrie needs a bath!" Nora said dramatically as she pointed to the bathroom with her free hand.**

***Sigh* "Nora, you can't just adopt someone like that." Ren told her bluntly as he rubbed his forehead.**

**"I don't care, he is Naruto Valkyrie now," Nora said adamantly, wrapping her arm around the sleeping boy to reaffirm this.**

**"Nora, Ren is right, we have to take him to the proper… and she's gone." Pyrrha said as Nora ran into the bathroom, the sound of the door locking and several things being moved in front of it echoing through the room. "This is gonna be a long night."**

"No doubt about that." Ren said with a sigh while Pyrrha and Jaune nodded, all three of them aware of how stubborn Nora could be when she set her mind on something.

**-With Glynda-**

**The stern blonde teacher tapped her foot impatiently as she rode the elevator up. She was currently headed towards Ozpin's office, since he wasn't to be found in his room. As soon as the doors opened, she marched right into the room ready to demand those damn security camera's, only to stay quiet as she found herself facing not only the familiar grey haired, green suit wearing headmaster of beacon, but also a certain drunkard huntsman she had the …pleasure to deal with.**

'_Well… this is disconcerting.'_ Glynda thought as it was one thing to see her students in the video, given that there was still the small chance they could have just filmed this beforehand as a prank, but to see herself on screen as well in a situation she clearly did not remember being in.

Disconcerting was putting it lightly.

"Oh hey, its Druncle Qrow!" Ruby said excitedly, before suddenly freezing with a thoughtful expression. "Wait, why is he here?"

"Good question." Glynda said, the stern professor's gaze narrowing as she stared at the chronically drunk Huntsman.

**"Ah Glynda, perfect timing, I was just about to call for you." Ozpin said calmly as he sat behind his desk and sipped at a cup of hot cocoa.**

**"Ozpin… Qrow… is something wrong? Did something happen?" Glynda asked neutrally as she walked up to them, Qrow may get on her nerves with his constant drinking and flippant attitude, but he wouldn't be here unless it was important. Her cameras would have to wait for now.**

**"Nothing too bad, sugar tits," Qrow, a man with greying black spiky hair and dull red eyes, wearing a simple grey dress shirt, black dress pants, and a tattered red cloak, said as he drank from a flask. **

"Did he seriously just…" *Creeeak* Jaune started to ask, only to trail off as an ominous creaking reached his ears. Turning his head, the scraggly blonde couldn't help but gulp nervously at seeing the violet violent aura seemingly oozing off of Glynda as she glared at the screen, her riding crop almost bent in half.

**Glynda barely restrained a growl as she glared at the man, her eyebrow already twitching slightly as she tightened her grip on her riding crop. "Our little visitor from the veil has finally arrived."**

Thankfully, before the witch-themed professor was snapped from her anger by her boss's counterpart's statement before she could snap, much to all the students relief.

"Little visitor?" Weiss parroted with a raised brow.

"Ooh, they must be talking about Naruto," Ruby said after a moment. "He's definitely little and the timing makes perfect sense."

"That would explain how he got into Beacon unnoticed, the Dust crate he fell asleep in must've been a trick in order to bring him up without anyone noticing," Blake muttered thoughtfully, getting a round of agreements and nods. "But then that begs the question, how he ended up in the kitchen all by himself?"

**And just like that, all the anger on her face vanished, replaced with a serious/curious look faster than most could blink. "He's here? Where?"**** Ozpin sighed as he rubbed his temple.**

**"That's actually why we needed to call you… … we lost him."**

***Creeeeeeeak***

**Both Ozpin and Qrow shivered slightly as Glynda's face went completely blank, her riding crop almost bent in half from the pressure of her grip.**

**"Excuse me?"**

"Nevermind." The cat faunus said dully as the **-End of Chapter-** screen popped up before returning to the selection menu.

"So still think this is a hoax professor?" Yang asked, only to blink in confusion when she was met with silence. Turning to the teacher in question, the busty blonde along with everyone else was greeted by the sight of Glynda rapidly typing something into her scroll before holding it up to her ear.

...

"Ozpin, I need you to meet me at the dorms immediately, there is something you need to see right away."

-End Chapter-


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own anything from the Naruto or RWBY franchises. Comments/Criticism is fine as long as it isn't just hate or flaming

Thanks for reading and please enjoy

Reality Viewing: Nora's a Mommy

-Chapter 3-

"Yes… I know that… sir you really need too… well no but…" Back within a certain dorm common room, one Glynda Goodwitch could be found pacing back and forth as talked to someone on her scroll, a talk which was clearly not going well if the growing frustration on her face was to go by. "Yes I understand… alright… I'll stay here until then sir."

Clicking her scroll shut, the blonde professor sighed in exasperation while retaking her seat, completely oblivious to the nervous looks she was getting from the members of Team RWBY and JNPR.

"Soooo… is Professor Ozpin not coming or something?" Yang asked after a few moments of awkward silence passed, cautiously peeking out from behind her meat shield otherwise known as her little sister as she spoke.

"Not until he is finished with his meeting," Glynda stated bluntly as she swiftly took on her normal professional demeanor once more, although a noticeable tinge of annoyance bled in her voice while she spoke. "For the time being though I am to remain here and observe the situation in case of any further developments."

"Oh! Oh! Does that mean-"

"Yes Ms. Valkyrie, you may start the next episode now." The blonde cut said hyper orangette off with a dry look which was completely ignored.

"YES! It's about time!" Nora exclaimed excitedly, remote already in hand as she quickly flicked down the selection list to the third chapter and hit the start button.

**-Baths, Bubbles, and a Broken Window-**

"Well this bodes well already." Wiess couldn't help but mutter sarcastically the moment that title popped up on the screen.

**-Team JNPR Bathroom-**

**"That should keep them out." Nora said happily as she finished barricading the door with everything she could find, which wasn't easy considering she was still wrapped up in Naruto's tails as he clung to her side. **

"How DID she do that? Her arms are practically tied to her waist." Blake pointed out with a raised brow as she turned to the 'real' orangette, who smirked playfully in response and wagged a finger.

"Now that'd be telling~."

"Never underestimate the capabilities of a determined Nora." Ren added with a shake of his head whilst Jaune and Pyrrha just nodded in agreement.

**The bathroom itself was moderately sized, with a large tub/shower that had a variety of shampoos, conditioners, soaps, and body washes.**

**The toilet sat to the left with a fluffy pink seat cover, a sink on the right with a large mirror and multiple toothbrushes, and the cabinet for towels and such which had been moved in front of the door. The barricade was quickly put to the test as the door shook from heavy knocking. "Nora! Come out here so we can talk about this like reasonable adults!" Pyrrha's voice rang through the door.**

Snickering not so softly to herself, Yang reached over and patted Pyrrha's shoulder with a joking look of sympathy. "You do know there is such a thing as hoping for too much, right Red?"

"…Yeah." The redhead mumbled with a defeated sigh before bursting into giggles alongside the busty bombshell brawler.

"Oh come on guys, now your just being mean." Nora grumbled while shooting the pair a dour look, only to end up proving their point even further when she crossed her arms and stuck her nose in the air with a childish huff when they just giggled even louder.

**"No! If we take Naruto to the cops, they'll put him in an orphanage! And you know what's been happening to the faunus in those!" Nora said adamantly.**

"_Do you know what she's talking about Blake_?" Ruby asked her teammate quietly, sidling closer to the cat-girl in disguise as she spoke.

"_Not for sure, but I have a few ideas." _Blake stated, a few less than pleasant thoughts flickering through her mind while she sipped at a can of tea she got from… somewhere.

**"Hey! That was put to a stop!" Weiss's voice called back, though it didn't hold her usual sass and conviction in it. Six months ago, a board member of the Schnee Dust Company had been caught and arrested for smuggling faunus children out of orphanages and into dust mines to act as cheap labor.**

*Pfffffffffffffffffft* "What the fuck did I just hear?!" Blake demanded after the spit take of the century, her expression turning absolutely livid while her bow twitched wildly and the can in her grasp was crushed, further splattering tea everywhere.

Not that anyone else noticed as they all stared at the television in shock and disbelief, none more so than a certain Schnee heiress who's eyes looked like they were about to pop right out of her skull from how wide they were.

"T-that's… how could… I c-can't even… it's just…" Ruby stuttered out incoherently until Yang pulled her into a hug and started rubbing the top of her head.

"Of all the absolutely revoltingly despicable things I've heard, that is by far one of the worst." Glynda muttered in disgust, nearly bending her riding crop in half from how angry she was getting.

**It had been a huge blow to the company's image, with dozens of news sources spreading the debacle across the four kingdoms. Not to mention it sent the White Fang into a frenzy as many members of the now terrorist organization retaliated almost immediately. Nearly a hundred suicide bombings had been committed on SDC property, with almost two dozen managing to hit the Schnee Manor itself.**

"Oh my…" Pyrrha muttered softly as various clips played out on screen, ranging from massive mobs of people waving Anti-Schnee and Faunus Rights signs to the aftermath of the bombings.

A horrified gasp escaped Weiss's lips when one clip showed her home, the Schnee Manor, riddled with blast zones. The wall and fencing around the building had a multitude of holes blown through it on pretty much every side and over a third of the building itself had been reduced to nothing more than smoldering rubble.

All in all it was an utter wreck and the white haired heiress couldn't help but sniffle sadly at seeing her family home in such a state, even as the logical part of her brain tried to remind her that it wasn't real.

At the same time, Blake's soon found her righteous fury being gradually replaced with sadness as more and more of the clips played, showing the full scope of retaliation the White Fang had wrought. Stores, shops, shipping yards, pretty much anything that had even a remote connection to the Schnee Dust Company had been attacked or boycotted in some way.

**Jacques Schnee, the current president of the SDC, managed to spin himself off as a victim, claiming to have no clue to what his subordinate had been doing. Even allowing the police to thoroughly investigate the matter, but still left much bad publicity for the company to deal with.**

"Understatement of the fricking century there," Yang scoffed as she kept petting Ruby's head. "The fact they're still in business after something like that is a miracle in itself."

"One of the benefits of being so deeply engrained into the economy, they cannot simply be closed otherwise all the Kingdoms would suffer from severe Dust Shortages alone." Pyrrha said whilst Blake reluctantly nodded in agreement with a scowl.

Statistically speaking the Schnee Dust Company were involved in not only almost seventy percent of all Dust sales and trade but over a third of all business in general throughout Remnant, ranging from home products to weapons and ammo. So shutting them down out of the blue would effectively send the entire economy for all the Kingdoms spiraling down the toilet, much to the ravenette's chagrin.

**"Okay, I get your reluctance Nora! But we still have to notify the authorities! You'll be sent to jail if you try to keep Naruto without doing so!" Ren's voice spoke this time as he tried to reason with his oldest friend.**

**"Ren, I trust your opinion on a lot of things, but I'm sticking with my decision with this!"**

"Yeah, what I said." Nora stated as she crossed her arms adamantly, making Ren sigh with a facepalm.

"I'm not gonna even bother…"

**When she finished speaking, Nora gently shook Naruto causing him to stir. "Zzzz… wha…" Groggily waking up, his tails quickly unwound themselves as he moved to rub his eyes, only not falling to the floor thanks to Nora grabbing onto him as he started to slide down. "Orange lady? It's too *Yaaawn* too early …five more minutes." He started to drift back to sleep but Nora gave him another shake causing him to give her a cute glare as his cheeks puffed out.**

"Awwwww, he looks so cute," Ruby couldn't help but gush as the nine-tailed child's adorably pouting face appeared on screen. "I just want to hug him and cuddle with him and pet his head and snuggle with his tails…"

As the raven-redhead rambled on, many of the watching group couldn't help but sigh or slump in relief at the change of topic, the once dark mood lifting away. However, not a few moments later a certain blonde brawler gained a mischievous smirk before getting everyone's attention when she gasped overdramatically and looped an arm over Ruby's shoulders.

"Oh Ruby, why didn't you tell me you were into younger guys?" Yang asked in a joking serious tone, making her sister freeze up in her grasp and gain a blush the same color as her cloak. "Or is it because of the tails? Is that it Rubes? Are you into fluff-"

"YAAAAAAAAAAAANG!?" Ruby screeched at the top of her lungs, wrenching herself free before whirling around and raining down punches on the busty bombshell with embarrassed-fueled fury. Unfortunately for the cloaked teen, all this did was make Yang laugh as she effortlessly held her sister back with one hand.

"Hahahahha! I'm not hearing a denial~!"

This went on for several moments, with Yang continuing to tease, taunt, and goad Ruby with double-entendres between peals of laughter whilst the raven-redhead tried and failed to pummel her sister into oblivion. However, whilst the rest of the group were thankful for the lighthearted reprieve after the mother of all emotional bombs being dropped, after five nonstop minutes of the siblings' antics they soon started to grate on some nerves, especially for a witch-themed professor otherwise known as Glynda.

*Thwack* *ThwacK* "Ow!" "Youchie!" Both girls yelped in pain as they were swatted upside the head by the annoyed teacher.

"Aw come on, was that really necessary Professor?" Yang asked as she rubbed the rapidly growing lump on her head.

"Yes, yes it was." Glynda stated without hesitation while tapping the palm of her hand with the end of her riding crop.

**"Sorry little foxy, but you need a bath." Nora told him causing him to drop his glare in favor of a pout. Setting him onto the toilet with the seat down, she giggled softly as he continued to pout before tapping his nose with her finger. "Boop!"**

**She giggled much louder at the boy's baffled expression, before going over to the tub and turning on the faucet.**

"Hehe, he's acting just like a confused kitten." Pyrrha mumbled while covering her mouth in a failed attempt to stifle the giggle that escaped her lips.

"Indeed." Glynda stated, her lips curled upwards ever so slightly at the cuteness.

Both Ren and Nora smiled to themselves knowingly, well aware of the more personal meaning behind that innocent gesture.

**Running the water over her hand until it was at the right temperature, she popped the plug in and let the tub start filling as she dropped in a lavender bath bomb, which quickly filled it with purple tinged bubbles.**

***Bang, Bang, Bang* Come on Nora! You really need to open this door right now!" This time it was Jaune who spoke, "…We have panca-"**

**"JAUNE! I WILL BREAK BOTH YOUR LEGS IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP RIGHT NOW!"**

**"Y-y-y-yes M-m-m-Ma'am!" You do not use her favorite food against her like that… ever.**

"Hmph, damn right you don't." The hammer user said with crossed arms as she glowered at her team leader, who promptly held his hands up in surrender.

"Other me Nora! Other me!"

**Seeing the confused expression on Naruto's face, Nora simply said, "My friends are being stupid." Before turning the tap off since the tub was full and going back to the boy. "Now come on, time to get you out of those dirty clothes." Grabbing the bottom of his shirt, it was an easy matter of pulling it over his head and off, re-revealing the large black sun-like tattoo that covered the majority of his stomach.**

"What in the… what kind of barbaric moron would give such a young child tattoos?" Glynda demanded, her eyes widening briefly in surprise when the markings were revealed before narrowing as a scowl marred her lips.

"We think he may be from one of the outer island settlements of Mistral professor, so it's most likely from a local custom." The ever helpful Pyrrha chipped in, getting the professor to pause with a thoughtful expression.

"Hmmm, ah yes, I do believe Oobleck mentioned it before, something about supposedly helping ward off the Grimm if I'm not mistaken." She muttered after thinking it over for a few moments, although her frown remained. Custom or not, she did not like the idea of a child being forced to deal with the painful procedure of getting a tattoo, especially on an area as sensitive as the stomach.

**The pants on the other hand were a much bigger issue. Turns out that almost the entirety of the upper half of the back of his shorts were gone so that his tails could fit through without issue. This also meant she had to go through the tedious process of pulling each tail out one at a time, though it was interesting for her to see how all his tails were seemingly compacted together at their base into a single mass, about five inches or so wide, that connected them to his backside. When she did, she pulled his shorts and boxers off, cringing slightly as the horrible odor from built up sweat and dried crap wafted into her nose, and dropping them into a pile with his shirt.**

"The filth aside I will admit those tails are quite fascinating," Weiss said as she looked at said lengths of fluff curiously, doing her best to repress the revulsion she felt from the matted on filth and the described smell. "I mean, I've never even heard of a Faunus having multiple tails before. It makes me wonder how and why, don't you agree professor?"

"Indeed, I don't think I can recall any mentions of such individuals either." Glynda said with negative shake of her head.

"Well, there is the Lovestead* fable," This statement got more than a few raised eyebrows as everyone turned to Blake, the one who had spoken. "It's just a dumb made up story, but it implies that any faunus born with multiple traits is due to… close familial relations."

The moment these words left the disguised Faunus's lips, grossed out and disgusted looks appeared almost everyone else's faces as they quickly got what she was talking about.

"What?" …Except for Ruby that is.

"I'll explain it to you later Rubes." Yang told her sister casually… while crossing her fingers from both hands behind her back because there was no way she was having THAT conversation. Ever.

**Lifting the now naked child off the toilet, she brought him over to the tub and slowly set him into the water, noting how his expression changed from dread to surprise, then into confusion before settling on relaxed. **_**'By his reaction, he was probably expecting it to be freezing cold,**_**' She thought with a small frown as she grabbed a small wash rag, lathered it up, and started scrubbing. **

**The more she learned about this kid, the more pity she felt for him.**

**Psychologist she may not be, but to be an effective fighter, one had to be able to get a read on a person quickly and Naruto was practically an open book for her. He was clearly an orphan, likely starved for attention based on the way he trusted her so fast despite just meeting, and judging by the faint lines of discolored skin she was finding all over his body as she washed the dirt off and his barely suppressed flinching, abused.**

A somber silence filled the room once more while everyone watched with a mixture of sadness and sympathy as the grime and dirt was washed away from the child's form, thus revealing the various scars it once hid. Some appeared to be claw or bite marks, likely from either wild animals or worse Grimm, while others were simply to clean to be from anything other than a blade, such as the thin line stretching across his chest.

**Scrubbing his cheeks clean, her frown grew deeper as she found more tattoos underneath all the dirt and grime. Three thin parallel lines were situated on each cheek, giving him the appearance of having whiskers. She had no idea what the sun tattoo was for, but she could guess the whiskers were there as a kind of taunt towards the boy to make him feel even less human.**

Blake clenched her fists in anger upon coming to the same conclusion but otherwise chose not to comment, doing her best to keep her temper under check by reminding herself that this had not actually happened.

…Right?

**Shaking off the dark thoughts for now, Nora smiled as she intentionally tickled his belly while washing it, getting Naruto to giggle loudly as he squirmed. "Hahahahaha! Stop it, hahah, that, haha, that tickles!"**

"Hmph, looks like the tickling terror strikes once again." Ren stated with a soft nostalgic chuckle whilst Nora burst into giggles before talking a faux serious pose.

"Fear me for I will tickle you till you laugh yourself silly~!"

**"Never!" Dropping the rag, she started tickling him with a renewed fury, getting loud squeals of laughter from him. So focused on tickling the blonde, Nora forgot about his nine extra appendages until one wrapped itself around her waist causing her to pause.**

**"… …Uh-oh." *Splash***

**The tail yanked her into the tub, splashing water all over the room as she went under. Resurfacing a few seconds later, she spat out the soapy water caught in her mouth before getting tackled by the fox-boy. "Revenge!" This time, Nora was the one laughing like crazy as Naruto managed to get his small hands under her armpits and start wiggling his fingers against the ticklish areas.**

"Gah! What's this!?" Nora exclaimed overdramatically in fake shock. "Can it be? Is it so? Has the Tickling Terror been dethroned?"

Decidign to play along, Pyrrha barely managed to keep a straight face as she patted her teammate on the back 'sympathetically'. "So it would seem Nora, so it would seem."

'_Wow, now this brings back some memories.' _Meanwhile, a smile worked its way back onto Ruby's lips while she watched the orange and blonde duo playing around in the bathtub. For a few moments the raven-redhead could almost see the pair being replaced with herself and Yang when they were younger, playfully tumbling and roughhousing as they washed up after a long day of school and training.

She wasn't the only one thinking of such either apparently as Yang gently pulled Ruby into a deeper hug while resting her chip atop the little reaper's head with a smile of her own.

**Flailing around wildly, Nora just managed to grasp Naruto by the waist and pull him off of her. "Okay, that's enough goofing around for now, gotta finish getting you cleaned up," Nora said as she placed the boy down on the opposite side of the tub, facing him away from her. Nora grabbed a pink bottle of shampoo in one hand while gently grasping one of the multiple tails with the other, noting to herself how the boy stiffened up slightly from the contact. She made sure the entire tail was soaked with water before squeezing a decent amount of shampoo onto the fluffy limb and started lathering it up.**

**Repeating the process with the other eight tails and his hair, Nora tossed the now empty bottle into the trash as she stood up and pulled the plug, allowing the water to drain from the tub as she switched on the shower. **

"Yeesh, I know we were kidding about it earlier but seriously, an entire bottle of shampoo for just one bath? It's gonna cost the poor guy a literal fortune just to stay clean." Jaune said, getting a round of nods and agreements from the others, especially Yang and Weiss whom could sympathize due to their long hair needing a lot of care.

**Grabbing the shower head, she pulled it off the wall revealing the long, retractable hose as she quickly rinsed herself off before kneeling down to Naruto's height.**

**After making sure to thoroughly wash off all of the shampoo, she reattached the shower head to the wall, switched it off, and grabbed a bottle of conditioner. "This will have to sit for a little bit, so try not to move too much, okay?" She explained while rubbing the oily substance onto his head, getting a slow nod.**

_**'Hmm, wonder why the other haven't tried anything yet.'**_** Nora thought as she waited for the conditioner to work, occasionally glancing at the blocked door. **

"Good point other me," Nora said with a nod, rubbing her chin in thought as she turned to the watching group. "I know Renny would wait a bit to let me cool down but the rest of you guys should have totally tried something by now."

"Gotta agree with you there, normally I would have just knocked the door down, it's what I did anytime Rubes locked herself in the bathroom at home when she tried putting on my makeup anyway." Yang said offhandedly while Ruby sank into her cloak in embarrassment.

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANG!"

"Well maybe this version of you actually read the introductory pamphlet," Weiss stated sarcastically while pulling out said pamphlet from a nearby table and shoving it into the blonde's arms. "Then at least she'd know that all the doors in Beacon are reinforced for the students' safety and privacy."

Blinking in surprise, Yang idly flipped through the paper curiously. "Huh, I didn't know we had a Sauna room on the other side of the pool."

"Wait, really?" Nora asked as she and Ruby started reading over the blonde's shoulder, making Weiss facepalm with an aggravated groan.

**She had honestly expected them to try and knock the door down by now and yet it had been completely quie-**

***CRASH* "What the hell!?"**

**Nora and Naruto nearly jumped out of their skin as the sound of breaking glass and yelling echoed in from the other room.**

All of teams RWBY and JNPR had similar reactions, with Ruby taking cover behind Yang, Jaune and Pyrrha falling out of their seats after accidentally knocking their heads together, and Weiss almost following after if Blake didn't catch the hem of her dress.

"…Owww…"

"Sorry!" Pyrrha exclaimed as she hopped up and helped her still dazed team leader/oblivious crush back to his seat, wincing slightly when she saw the not-so-small welt on the young man's noggin thanks to her circlet.

Even Glynda couldn't help but flinch slightly, albeit almost unnoticeably, in surprise before quickly regaining her composure as she sighed. "Do I even want to know what that was?"

"Probably not, but let's find out anyways." Yang chipped in after recovering from her own shock, which only made the professor sigh again.

**-Team JNPR Bedroom, Fifteen minutes earlier-**

**Jaune banged on the bathroom door as everyone else minus Yang and Ruby stood behind him. "Come on Nora! We really need you to open this door right now!" He yelled, only to be met with silence. "…we have panca-!"**

**"JAUNE! I WILL BREAK BOTH OF YOUR LEGS IF YOU DO NOT SHUT UP RIGHT NOW!"**

**"Y-y-yes M-m-m-m-Ma'am!" Jaune stuttered out, backing away from the door so fast that he bumped into one of the beds and fell over.**

**"I told you that would not work." Ren said with a dull look as he watched Pyrrha help the floundering blonde to his feet.**

"Déjà vu." Weiss stated dryly as she looked from the blond-redhead duo on screen and then to the pair in the room with her with a dull gaze.

**"Well it was the only idea I had left. Now what do we do?" Jaune asked.**

**"We could break the door down." Yang suggested while walking in the room, Ember Celica now on her wrists, Ruby right behind her with Crescent Rose in its compact state.**

**"No, we can't," Weiss said. "All the doors are reinforced for safety and privacy. You'd risk hurting the child to do so." Yang and Ruby deflated at this.**

**"Awwww, sorry Cressy, no fun for you tonight," Ruby told her weapon with a pout as she down on Nora's bed and started rocking it like a baby, not noticing the odd looks she was getting from everyone except Yang.**

"Ms. Rose, Ms. Xiao Long, I do hope that your counterparts are not implying that destroying school property is… fun." Glynda said in a stern tone while fixing the siblings with an equally stern look that caused them both to start sweating heavily.

"N-no ma'am!" "Not at a-all professor!"

"Good."

**"Maybe we should say we have pan-"**

**"Already tried that, didn't end well." Jaune cut the bodacious blonde off, getting her to snap her fingers.**

Now it was Jaune's turn to start cowering in fear again as Nora once more glowered at him and Yang for having the audacity to even consider using something as sacred as _pancakes_ against her.

**Everyone paused as they heard laughter and splashing coming from the bathroom. For a minute or so, they just sat/stood there in silence as they heard the happy squeals. Pyrrha was the first one to snap back to reality, sighing to herself as she walked over to her bed and grabbed her scroll. This action snapped the rest of the group out of their trance and made them all look to her as she started rifling through her contacts.**

**"Uh, Pyrrha, what are you doing?" Ruby asked.**

**"What we should have done from the start, I'm calling Professor Goodwitch and reporting this."**

**"At three o'clock in the morning?" Blake asked in her normal casually sarcastic tone while glancing at the clock hanging on the wall.**

"I'm sure she'd understand once I'd explained the situation." **"I'm sure she'll understand once I explain the situation." Pyrrha said firmly as she found the teacher's number and hit the call button.**

"Ha, talk about hearing in stereo." Yang punned with a chuckle as both Pyrrha's ended up saying almost the exact same thing at the same time, making the 'real' one smile sheepishly as she scratched the back of her head.

***riiiiing* … *riiiing***

**Everyone found themselves watching with bated breath as the scroll rang. Seconds crawled by as each ring sounded out. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, there was a soft clicking as the scroll connected and Glynda's face appeared on screen. "**_**Hello, 'Glynda Goodwitch' is currently unable to answer at the moment. Please leave a message after the beep**_**." *Beep* "**_**Message box is full."**_

**"Damn it," Pyrrha grumbled as she closed the scroll and plopped onto her bed. "Well, Professor Goodwitch is a very busy person, she's probably just enjoying a good night's rest as we speak."**

**-With Glynda-**

**"OF ALL THE BONE HEAD, DUMBASS, IDIOTIC THINGS YOU COULD HAVE DONE! YOU LOST HIM!?" Glynda yelled as she towered over the cowering Qrow and Ozpin.**

"EEEP!" "YIKES!" "Holy crap!" "AAAH!" Once more chaos erupted through the room as everyone aside from Glynda herself jumped in terror when the witch-themed woman's counterpart enraged face suddenly appeared on screen with a sharp dramatic note.

Weiss somehow ended up being held in a bridal carry by Blake when she jumped out of her seat, neither of them sure exactly how that happened, Jaune once more fell out of his seat, and Nora dove behind the couch with Ren in tow. At the same time, Yang hid behind Ruby who in turn grabbed Pyrrha to use as meat shield from the scary teacher on screen.

**"N-now now, Glynda, t-there i-i-is a per-perfectly reasonable e-e-explanation." Ozpin stuttered with his hands held up in surrender as he tried to pacify his raging subordinate.**

**"DON'T YOU 'REASONABLE EXPLANATION' THIS! YOU WILL GET OFF YOUR LAZY, HOT COCOA DRINKING ASS, GET OUT THERE, AND FIX THIS MESS RIGHT NOW!"**

**Without giving either of them a chance to speak again, Glynda flicked her riding crop at them and the two men were sent flying out of the nearest window with a scream. **

'…_She just threw the headmaster of Beacon out a fifteen-story window.'_ Weiss thought in disbelief once she'd recovered from her earlier shock, unknowingly mirroring the rest of her team's thoughts and barely noticing as Blake tossed her back into her own seat.

**Taking a few deep breathes, the busty blonde teacher heard a slight beeping coming from her pocket and pulled out her scroll to see she had missed a call.**

**"What in Oum's name does Ms. Nikos need at three o'clock in the morning?" She asked herself before shaking her head and refocusing on the current situation.**

'_I'm pretty sure I just dodged a bullet there.'_ Pyrrha thought with a shiver.

**-Back to the others-**

**"Yeah, you're probably right."**

**"Well, I guess the only thing left is to just wait it out," Yang said while clapping her hands together, and started walking to the door. "I'm going to call it a night for now, not like the solution to this is going to just come waltzing in the door." And she was right, the answer did not come in through the door…**

***CRASH* "What the hell!?"**

…**It came in through the window.**

**Everyone was baffled as they stared at the two men who had just crashed through Team JNPR's dorm window and onto the floor in a tangled mess of limbs. One everybody recognized immediately as the headmaster of Beacon Academy, Ozpin, while only two of the group knew who the second man was.**

**"Uncle Qrow!?" Ruby and Yang yelled in sync as the two men untangled themselves and stood up.**

"Damn, nice shot professor," Yang said as she let out a low impressed whistle. "Have you ever considered taking up golf? Because that was one hell of a hole in one."

"I'm more partial to billiards actually," Glynda retorted with a wave of her hand, before her eyebrow twitched when the busty brawler started looking at her funny. "What? Is there something wrong with me having a hobby?"

"Of course not professor Goodwitch! It's just…" Yang quickly said with her hands raised up in surrender, only to trail off when a mental image of Glynda playing a game of pool at a bar popped in her head, bent over the table to line up her shot with a beer by her side-

*Thwack* "Ow! What was that for?" The younger blonde demanded, rubbing the newly formed welt atop her noggin while her teacher stared at her blandly.

"I know exactly what you are thinking and you are going to stop thinking it right now."

**"Heya brats, how's it going?" Qrow asked casually, like he didn't just come flying into the room via window, only to get glomped by the two girls as they started talking at the same time.**

**"What are you doing here?"**

**"Did you miss me?"**

**"When did you get here?"**

**"Are you gonna teach me a new move?"**

**"You wouldn't believe what happened in the last hour."**

**"We gotta show you some-!" Qrow covered both of their mouths with his hands, effectively muting them.**

**"Sorry, would love to stay and chat but me and Ozzy here have a job to do." He told them bluntly before pulling his hands back. **

**"He is correct," Ozpins said as he dusted himself off and accepted his cane from Pyrrha with a nod of thanks, "We have to get going, but may I ask what you all are doing up at this hour, and why is Ms. Valkyrie not present?"**

**"She's barricaded in the bathroom, giving a bath to a faunus kid she found on campus and now wants to adopt." Blake told them bluntly getting blinks of surprise.**

**"…"**

"That does sound pretty bad out of context, huh?" Nora mumbled with an awkward smile on her lips, which only grew as the 'real' Blake stared at her with a solid 'no shit sherlock' deadpan.

**"… He wouldn't happen to be about this tall, blonde, nine red tails, and love to eat dust, would he?" Qrow asked while holding his hand at hip height, getting baffled looks from all the teens.**

"Well that confirms that mystery at least," Weiss said as the 'End of Chapter' notice appeared before returning to the selection screen. "Looks like you were right again Ruby."

Blushes sheepishly at the praise, Ruby was about to wave it off as nothing but was cut off when Yang pulled her into a bear hug with a cheer, smooshing the poor girl's face right into her bust. "Yeah, two for two so far, go sis!"

"Mmmmph!"

"That was certainly an… intense episode though," Ren muttered as he thought back towards the start with the child mine incident while Weiss flinched and Blake scowled heavily at the reminder. "Certainly did not see that coming."

"No kidding." Pyrrha said with a frown marring her lips, the mere thought of someone doing such a thing making her want to punch something.

"Oh my," A new voice suddenly chipped in, catching everyone's attention as they turned towards the source to see none other than Professor Ozpin standing at the doorway with his ever-iconic cup of coffee in hand. "It would seem I missed something pretty important, haven't I?"

-End Chapter-

AN: Fun-fact, around the same time I posted the second chapter of this story an animator on Youtube posted a fan video called World of Remnant: Lovestead, which was apparently so convincing that a couple people thought it was canon and complained about how me giving Naruto multiple tails meant he was inbred. It was thankfully cleared up real quick but I thought it'd be neat to throw in a brief mention of it for nostalgias sake. For those of you who might be more curious to understand the full context, the video is still up on Youtube so feel free to go check it out for yourself.

Thanks for reading and please review.


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